Finally almost done with school for the year I am way exsited. Just one more year after this and I am free, free at last. I have some big plans for this summer. I am going to start living more in the here and now and less in the future. I am going to quit daydreaming and start making my dreams come true. Life is short and I am reminded of that more and more as I get older. Two 15 year old boys that I went to school with where killed in a car reck a couple weeks ago. One of the boys had lost his older brother not 6 monthes earlier. There parents lost both of there childern in a matter of months. That is a terrifing thought to me I have always been afraid of losing the ones I love most. I have not had to deal with death directly yet in my life and I never want to but I now it is a part of life. So I try never to let some one I love leave thinking that I am bad at them or any thing that They or my self may regret if something was to happen.
I have heard that some people dont say good bye because they want to believe that they will always come back. I dont under stand that. I think if a person should live like it was there last day so they should always say good bye with love. I dont see how a person would be able to bare the thought of not being able to say that. I am scared of that happening, I try my best but I dont always manich it.
I remember once when I was really little I forgot to give my dad a kiss good night, I was really upset. At that time I always said good night with a kiss. But when I realized I hadnt that night I started to cry. My parents where already asleep and I new I should wake them up. I didnt now what to do. My older brother was ther and I was so worked up that I woke him up. He sat up and gave me a kiss on the cheek and told me to go back to sleep.
I dont now if he remembers that or if it is really a memory or just a dream but it is somethingI will remember forever. I love my family with all my heart if any thing was ever to happen to me I want them all to now that.